Adding More Character Day by Day

I haven’t been to the dentist in 3, 4, OK it has been 5 years.  I have a really good excuse.  I probably have the best excuse ever.  I was scared.


You see, 5 years ago my mom had a stroke after being in the dentist’s chair for 2 1/2 hours.  Her head bending back all that time cut off the circulation to her head (I know, ick).  I am not going to go into the details because I still get sad about it.  It was an Ordeal with a capital “O.”  She was healthy as a horse – her doctors said it was a fluke.


I don’t like flukes.



Then she works up the courage to go again, a year later, and she has a seizure.


Huh.


So, I have had a good excuse these past 5 years, don’t ya think?  I am her spawn after all.


Well, for the past 3 years I have been working up the courage to make the appointment.  It has been rather pathetic when my darling 9-year-old asks me why we aren’t going to the dentist.  I would never tell her the real reason.  However, Mommy can’t keep forgetting to make that appointment.  Emily is getting older and really questionning me.  Oh the guilt I have felt.


So I finally bit the bullet, called and made the appointment last week.  I actually shook uncontrollably when I did it.  But do you know what?  That was the hardest part.  For the past week I have been so relieved and actually excited to go.


Today was the day and I lived to tell about it.  There was a part of me that thought while driving in the car that, perhaps, I would drive to Starbucks instead and get myself a mocha.  Thankfully, I didn’t.


I had a bajillion x-rays and 1 cavity.  My teeth need to be thoroughly cleaned and they said I need a wisdom tooth out someday.  I have never had a wisdom tooth out and the horror on my face must have said it all, which is why they added “someday.” 


Driving home I felt so silly for waiting all this time.  For letting fear stop me.  For letting the guilt of not going hang on my shoulders for 5 years.  But, I am not going to keep beating myself up.  Maybe I needed those 5 years.

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