Meet the Parents

My parents are my neighbors.


And not in the weird Raymond kind of way. In a very cool kind of way. They are hilarious and funny and cool. You haven’t heard much about them because of the stupid Swine Flu. The docs at the Mayo Clinic told my dad that he cannot be around children until he is vaccinated, due to his kidney transplant and weakened immune system.

It has sucked the big time, let me tell you. I missed seeing those guys. However, the Swine Flu has dissipated and both girls have had both of their shots so they are back!


Emily had her basketball tournament the other night and both of my folks came. I sat in between them because whereas I talk to mom on the phone I haven’t see dad forever. There is something about those two that just makes my light shine bright! So many memories and so many good times we have all had.

We are talking and laughing and then mom begins to cough… hard. I look at her and well, she isn’t drinking or eating anything so I figure she has maybe swallowed wrong?

Then she begins to, like, choke and she is gasping for air and I kind of pat her on the back a little because by now I do not know what is going on. Then she mutters “Water!”

And then she says it again, but I don’t have any water. And I look at my dad who is looking lost at this point and then over the cheers of the crowd you hear my mom gasp, “Jim give me your water.” And I look at my dad and he still is kind of looking lost and then you hear this,

“Give me your water now, asshole!” Which is just the appropriate thing to say at school with a bunch of 3rd and 4th graders, right?

And dad quickly (not really) as he can gets his water bottle out of his pocket and hands it to her. She had choked on her breath mint while cheering.

After she drinks it, dad says to her, “It was mostly backwash you know.”

Good times – good times.

Glad you guys are back!


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