Funeral Planning on a Whole New Level

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Here is an oxymoron for you: A Fun Funeral.

We went to a funeral recently. After the funeral, we were talking to my parents, who also attended.

My parents, as usual, were full of the crazy:

Mom: Wow, we don’t know this many people.

Dad: Ya, the whole town came. We need to get some friends.

Mom: Our funeral will be pathetic.

Dad: We need to get some friends.

Mom: Laura, make sure to put in our funeral notice that there will be a FREE buffet.

Me: OMG.

Mom: Did you see all of the pictures they had of her? Laura – make sure when I die that you really put a lot of effort into the pictures of me.

Me: Do you want me to start now? So I make sure to do a good job?

Mom: That is a great idea!!!

Dad: I want some good music at my funeral.

Me: So, like, a soundtrack? Should I make you a soundtrack of your favorite songs?

Dad: Ohhhh yes. That would be so cool. Yeah… a soundtrack.

Me: Well, as long as we are getting totally crazy, how about we put up your art instead of pictures of you? We can hang them all along the funeral parlor.

Dad: Really? My own showing? Cool.

Me: Dad, you would be DEAD!! Maybe you should not be getting so excited over this.

Tyler: You know, we could put price tags on each canvas and then a slash over the price with a HIGHER price! His art will be worth more when he is dead.

Dad: OH that’s right! How much do you think I would make?


Mom: Don’t forget about me! I want good pictures.

Me: At this point, I might just kill you both now. This is all crazy talk!

Mom: But you’re going to start working on it NOW right? You will be pretty broken up to do a good job when we actually die.

Me: Sure mom. I’ll get on it now.

In theory, it is a good idea to get started on their “requests.”

In actuality, it is creepy and morbid.

If these were your parents, what would YOU do?


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